toughest semester had ad past for lk 4 days..it's the sem wher u can see shuang's really very hardworking, work wit my ass off ok? never hv my spec put on me for that long period of time in a single day.. have no idea why i did that honestly.. cause first sem's result ad kinda told me ther's not much hope.. but, i wouldnt say it's very torturing or whatsoever.. cuz i did slept for 6 hours per day, nap in the afternoon n watched a lot of dramas as u guys know~ =)
frankly, im disappointed at some point today.. it's not that it had never really happened b4.. but, sometim i would wonder what shuang really means to others o??typically just someone u meet in college n forget about after college?? u can say i think too much... perhaps i really do.. but i really just wanna try my best to treasure everyone in my life.. mayb due to the fact im libra i guess.. will hv that bizarre kind of thinking, wher how i feel for someone, i wish they would feel the same way that i do....
or it may even be possible that bcuz i've meet with ppl that as they found their dreams n their path, they would totally forget about u.. regardless of how best frenz u guys were.. they just care about their own benefits n busy with their own life.. but that certainly wouldnt be fair for those who treated me with their heart.. cuz i finally get to meet those ppl in my college year.. trying my best to open up myself right now..for them.. letting go of the past, pursuing to be better me in the future..
but i myself do know too... that's the process of growing up.. as u aged, better hv less expectations for things n ppl around.. just try ur best in everything.. God will see it, n ppl with their lovely soul n heart would know that too... =)
anyways.. been resting a lot for these few days n today finally hang out n hv some fun wit frenz...they can sing very damn well~hahax!
but, surprisingly, i've forgotten how it feels to spend money.. if it was me for the past few months at tis period of time i would probably ended up very damn broke.. plus, i've been 'not in the mood' to really hang out much too...
just wanna get things started asap.. cause i got many aims on hand.. it's a bit stressful to me..
sent out two mails today for application of jobs n both of them replied.. it was actually quite organized in the first place wher i work for one in midvalley during the weekends n another in times square for weekdays.. rounded up everything, by working from 5th to 21st, n im allowed to get off day for 3 days of the CNY, i could get around 2k.. who knows, the guy suddenly called n said oh no, u juz need to work for 2 days... what the heck.. ad so nicely planned.. aiks! it became less than 1k =(
should i stil continue to b freelancer or find one more stable jobs with more stable income ha??
n how bout my final year project?
my swimming lessons?
my french?
n my violin??
arghhh......
choices are everywhere, n im set to go..!
never really worry i can't handle it..
see, some ppl would find it distracting or kinda worry to go outside the world, face the reality..but it's a bit fun for me... im actually quite familiar with how things go around..
n i always looking forward the days when i finally grad get out, n start to make some colours for my life..
but, i would say, it may be too familiar that i know every pros n cons of everything n start to think too much! n i certainly will expect a lot from myself too...
u guys would probably stay in the other end saying this girl, overly confident man!
aiks~ of course im not~ that would just me tryin to persuade myself that it's going to be easy..
every jobs actually hv their own difficulties.. still could recall how i cried when i got bac home cuz couldnt perform wel as i work for dior last time... they just continuously criticize u , judge u,etc etc.... well, i hv to say, they were my motivation to get fat actually~ i don wanna look lk a skinny little gal who is weak to them.. they certainly did make me feel lk im nobody who could do nothin at tat time..
so, hopefully, im not that girl anymore...
sigh~bit worry i can't really get things done as i wanted them to be..
hm......
speechless with my 'so many concerns' n thoughts, just lk how my family members always complain bout how i am~~~
JH back pg lur...so now basically the house's empty, just me alone..
bit scary at times..specially when night has come...
somehow at some point, i wish the night could be shorter~or mayb human don hv to go to bed...
trainings for the job will get started soon...n im so darn free for weekdays..
mayb i should not stress myself too much n tk it slow ba.. i could probably read some journals by then.. n work harder for next few months~ all i need is luck n chances!~
just can say..
good luck to myself ba!~~~
sorry if i bla too much today............
kept myself drown in loads of papers n notes for 3 months, not having some outings...
now that i need to go out n talk to strangers, having strangers calling me now n then asking my conformation bout my schedule, mails with unknown sender wher u dunno which job they refering to..sighness~~it could really goes a bit crazy~
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